Whenever I hear the word SHAME, I picture that iconic scene from GOT where Cersei Lannister does the ‘Walk of Shame’ through Kingslanding with the septa ringing the bell to draw attention, and the onlookers hurling waste and excrement at her while she is walking.

As womxn, shame is such a huge part of our lives. We are shamed for the way we look. Shamed for being too ‘fat’, shamed for being too ‘thin’. Shamed for the type of hair we have. Shamed for not having babies, shamed for having too many babies. Shamed for not wanting any babies, shamed for having terminations. Shamed for growing older. Shamed for having body hair. Shamed for being too sexy. Shamed for not being sexy enough. Shamed for being womxn. It’s an endless cycle of shame, shame, shame… Our bodies seem synonymous with shame.

What started out as patriarchal (maybe even religious) conditioning has morphed into something more, something worse. Womxn shaming womxn. And even worse, you shaming yourself and me shaming myself. Shame runs deep, and it is stopping us from doing what we were born to do.

Shame has been coming up so much for me lately. And I know when something is alive for me, other womxn are feeling it too. I’m realising that it is an emotion like any other emotion. I no longer run away from it. I allow myself to feel it and allow it to move through me. I’ve been using the following tools to help regulate my nervous system while experiencing shame:⁣

  • Movement as medicine – feeling the emotion and allowing it to move through my body⁣ (doing this while listening to music is works so well)
  • Conscious breathwork – taking a minute or two to connect to my breath throughout the day ⁣
  • Grounding myself – literally walking barefoot on the grass outside ⁣
  • Puppy cuddles on the couch – one of my favourite ways to start the day ⁣
  • Self-soothing through touch, taste and smell ⁣

Have you been experiencing any emotions that make you feel uncomfortable? How do you deal with these emotions?

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